Common sense for new parents. The title is in intriguing, but as a new parent I can say all common sense goes out of the window due to sleep deprivation. MSN.com in their Healthy Living section has released 10 ways to help manage your stress.
As I can agree with the jist of these, I can't help but think this article must have been written by a man, someone who never lived through the stress of a newborn from a mother's perspective. A lot of the rules are great "guidelines" but usually must be tweaked to your own baby and life.
The first rule is take care of yourself. Well, this is fine in theory. But really? Any new mom knows that the "sleep when the baby sleeps" rule is something that everyone says but no one, not even those who say it, actually do. When the baby sleeps, that's when you shower and make yourself feel human again, or get laundry and housework done. If I didn't get a shower a day when I was home on maternity leave, I didn't feel like me. This was the one thing I tried, some days unsuccessfully, to be able to do just for me.
Go with the flow is #3. This one is soo true. Your life and your plans are no longer yours. This was something I had to get use to. I was the one always planning and making sure in detail we knew what was happening when. Four months later and I think I have finally grasped this. If only we could get others to understand we no longer make the plans and trust me, even if we have plans-things change like that.
#6 is Get Out of the House and while this is a must, it just isn't worth the hassle most days with a new baby. In theory going for a walk with a newborn in the stroller is just down right pleasant. In execution-there's a whole lot of stuff that needs to travel with you and the baby needs to be in the right mood. And it's one thing you will learn, your baby will never be in the right mood for you and what you have planned...oh wait, we learned not to make plans already!
Keep Your Perspective is #9. I am not sure what piece of advice I was given that annoyed me the most, but this was up there. Yes, I logically know that everything with a newborn is a phase and yes "this too will pass" but when you're knee deep in dirty diapers, covered in spit up holding a baby who won't stop crying-it feels endless and the last thing you want is a cheery "it will pass" What you really wanna do is take the dirty diapers and cram them down the throat of the said cheery advice giver.
For the full list of ways to "cope" with a newborn, click here
The best piece of advice I received while pregnant, and after having Ashtynn with us was from our friend Steve. He said, "I will only give you one piece of advice. Don't listen to anyone's advice." And he was sooo right! I will listen, but in truth, most of it is forgotten by the time the person is finished speaking. This is now my advice to all new moms: Do what works for you and your baby, no one else knows the dynamic like you do. Listen to yourself, your baby and no one else.